Friday, 25 February 2011

More than just a number

I'm feeling a little ranty right now and I need to express. 

Am I always going to be known as the one who had the cancer? The one who had chemo? The one who's got a possible short life expectancy? The one with the bald head? The one that was very ill? The one that had the stem cell transplant? 

Yes, I am all these things but believe it or not, the last time I looked, I'm still the same person I was prior to 19th May 2010 - I just happen to have gone through all of these other things too.

I do not need or expect special treatment because, like a lot of other people who are going through and have been through this vile disease, I'm big enough and strong enough to say, even SHOUT if I need to be treated differently - for whatever reason.

I will speak up. I do not need to be wrapped in cotton wool. 

Being diagnosed with a serious illness does not suddenly make you a better person. It gives you perspective, an outlook change and perhaps humility but as I have mentioned in one of my earlier blog posts, I'm lucky in that I know I had all these qualities before my illness. I'm not being a big head but sorry, I did.

I also said that I don't want this cancer to define me although I'm guessing, in fact I know, that this is not going to be the case with how some people perceive me.

Yes, I appreciate that this is all coming across as the slightly neurotic and altogether mad mouthing off of someone who needs to punch a pillow instead, but, do you know what? I don't really give a toss. Live the life of a cancer fighter and tell me how you feel after that.

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