Trying not to let the madness set in...

...and win.  

Those in the know will know that planning a wedding no matter how chilled, small, informal, formal, boho, quirky, intimate, vintage or modern it is that a certain amount of organizing is involved be it liaising with the Registrar, photographer or the man that will polish your shoes.  We think we are winning and as it is now only 2 weeks away (2 weeks!?!?!), the 'garnish' as Mat calls it is what we are left with to finish it off.  

In the meantime, we are trying to let life carry on without the fog of wedding madness overtaking us.  Since I posted about finding THE dress, I have now had my fittings to ensure that said dress fits as good as can be and have one more so that it is just so. What a faff but as it's the one and only time I get to look bridal, hey ho!  

Amongst all this and since I last blogged:

• I have experienced a colonoscopy. No more said other than everything is in tip-top condition 'down there' and I wouldn't rate it as one of life's great experiences.  

• I've been properly measured for a bra. My puppies are now sitting up and begging properly.

• We went to Cornwall where I got to do some sea cliff climbing but the weather could have been better. A lot better.

• I had a mini hen-birthday pre-wedding celebration that wasn't really very raucous in the traditional sense but very much what I wanted. Although I do enjoy taking part, I'm not really a fan of traditional hen-do's.

• Models and/or those that earn their living posing/having their photo taken/looking at a camera for hours on end deserve all the money they get. Having spent nearly 3 hours "cuddling like kittens" and "acting like we hadn't seen each other for years" for our photographer during our pre-wedding 'engagement' shoot, I was ready to jump into the Serpentine.  The photos are actually rather good and we are very pleased with them.  Clearly a very good photographer as we are not great models!

• I've been reminded of how people can let you down in more ways than one.

• One day print size and font and paper quality will not be a BIG DEAL to me.

• I don't think I will ever be a 'girly' girl. Ever.

• My husband to be is actually more bridal than me. 

• I am extremely nervous yet excited all at the same time about the big day.

• I am very much looking forward to catching up with pretty much most of our favourite people on said big day.

• I need to get more sleep.

See you on the other side.

Not quite ready to jump yet....

.....but hard hat is firmly on....

......and hoping for a happy ending.




all photos belong to shewithacapitalV

Wedding dress found...

CLOSE BUT NO CIGAR...

.... and no it's not this one!  This is a beautiful dress but I looked like one of those toilet roll holders from the 70s in it as I neither have the grace, height or beauty to show it off in its splendour like the lovely model above does.

There was no drama other than getting told not to get upset about my couture size because I'm deceptively small. Hmmm. Thanks. There's a compliment in there somewhere!

Three months till the big reveal. Don't get too excited - it's me in a big dress remember.  You just know something will happen!

The 'storify' so far - clowns, cocktails, Viva Forever!

The irony of writing a blog post about the modicum of sporting prowess I achieved with my climbing is a few days after I posted this, I fell ill. As in full on flu or inn-flooo-enza as the source of contamination from my office calls it. 

They say the difference between a cold and flu is with a cold, you will pick up that 50 quid at the end of your bed and with flu you will leave it there. Well, in my case there could have been £5000 at the end of my bed and I still will have left it there as I felt so rotten. The fevers, the shakes and the hacking cough, the whole shebang. On top of that, I thought I would share the love and ended up infecting Mat! So for nearly a week we were in bed feeling sorry for ourselves. I would say I felt like death but having nearly been there, this was a close second!

There may also be an issue with after-effects I am experiencing from the drugs I was given to fix me but that is another story but I hasten to add not one to worry about.

Blogging duties took a back seat post recovery. I have been doing various bits and pieces and so in the interest of all social media, I thought I would 'storify' some of the tweets about the more interesting stuff I have been up to since my last blog post and have added extra comment in italics if needed.

Without further ado;

Sat 19th Jan - And to think he was my inspiration once. Not any more Lance Armstrong. What a sad disappointment of a man you are.
I can't bear him now. I read his books & they really inspired me during my cancer treatment. Turns out it was all lies. Fraud.

(I actually felt quite upset about this. One for another post I think).

Sat 19th Jan - All this lovely snow and I'm too ill to play in it. Envious of the kids outside. 

(The one time I get a sledge at Christmas and I'm too ill to use it - typical!)

Wed 23rd Jan - Have watched lots of movies in recovery & in short, everyone must watch Intouchables before Hollywood remakes & ruins this wonderful film.
Truly, truly wonderful. French film making at its best. My heart is still full of joy from it.


Thurs 31st Jan - Pre-theatre dinner at The Ivy, Viva Forever & then mojitos to celebrate Kira's 40th birthday. Great, fun girly evening!
Enjoyed #VivaForever more than I thought I would. It's not as bad as the critics have said. Go & see & make your own mind up! Lots of fun!
Still mightily impressed that Debs was able to get seats near us at such short notice. Real girl power! #VivaForever Lots of fun!
(The Ivy was wonderful but sadly we didn't see any A-listers, just a random Eastenders actor! To round off the evening, we ended up in Jewel where since I was last in there, the decor had changed, the clothing of the 'entertainment' had got smaller and cocktails not as well made as it could have been but fun all the same).

Fri 1st Feb - Fun evening out in Shoreditch. Don't usually drink beer but had my first beer cocktail. Surprisingly very good.
The vegetarian in the group not so happy. Piece of chicken bone somehow ended up in her noodles. Cue tears.  (And lots of awkward apologies from the staff...)
Dear London Buses, is it usual for your bus drivers to say we had to open the doors ourselves cos we should have got off at the last stop?!
Unhelpful, rude & drove like an idiot. Feel sorry for anyone having to use the 35 bus regularly & having to deal with this loser.
(Yep, all of the above did happen in one evening! Sometimes my life is like a bad sit-com).


Sat 2nd Feb - Cirque de Soleil Kooza at the Albert Hall this afternoon. This is my first ever Cirque & apparently we have great seats. Am excited!
Very excitable chocolate & popcorn lady at the Albert Hall. She's singing her wares opera style.
The Boden attired & well fed kids are getting excited by the clowns wandering round. Am genuinely scared. Please don't touch me. Hate clowns.  (I really do hate clowns)
Clowns gone *relaxes to enjoy show* Hate clowns!
(Apart from the clowns, Cirque de Soleil Kooza was incredible. Thank you Kev & Hanna for the tickets!)


Amongst all this, wedding planning continues & more cocktails are consumed. When my wedding willpower lets me I will write all the shenanigans to do with this otherwise just know that it is all 'happening'.  I think the phrase "it will be alright on the night" comes to mind...

Anyway, I have a cold. Some revolting fellow on the train sneezed into my hair (!!) a couple of days ago and so I have caught yet another lurgy. Only a cold mind so over and out for now to catch up on more zzzzzz.

Progress

6a! Look what I did!

I'm full of too much food and cannot sleep. Pork belly to be precise. It's just laying there. I'm trying to tire myself to sleep by reading various bits and pieces and reading back my last blog post on nearly losing my earring, I appear to sound a little batshit crazy! Wow. I'm OK, just not then!

Anyway, my big news so far is that I managed to finally complete a grade 6a route in climbing! Go me! For those not in the know, it is the easiest of the harder sport climbing grades and since I was introduced to it, this was always my aim grade. And I managed to do it yesterday at White Spider. I'm still a little bit pleased with myself.

It's not winning an Oscar, getting a gold medal at the Olympics or winning the Tour de France. But it's my Oscar, gold medal and yellow jersey achieved. It was neither pretty, all that hard or completed in one as I had to rest while hoofing it up there but I still did it.  

The last few weeks of climbing with Mat are really paying off. I am getting stronger, getting leaner and getting better. I still have a very long way to go to call myself 'good' but I am enjoying it and that's all that matters.

I took up climbing as it seemed a fun form of exercise. And a lot of people I know and love are into so it must be good.  I signed up to take lessons on belaying, knot-work and good technique. I think I did get good and then I had to stop because inconveniently I was diagnosed with cancer way back then. The steroids made me huge and slowed me down. Climbing just became really hard so I stopped for a while but I persevered. From not even managing to finish 5 climbs, I have progressed to 10 progressing to 11 to hopefully 12 each time I go. I can do this and I enjoy it. I'm not going to let this bastard disease stop me. F%&$ you cancer! 

Progress indeed.

photo by shewithacapitalV

Hope

These are my 'Hope' earrings. They're a 40th birthday gift from my TSC friends and mean a lot to me. I was able to choose them myself so they are very appreciated. I love how they are 'bold, stylish and sleek' although in my language what Links are trying to say is that 'they are a bit nice but not too bling'. 

As they are silver, they cost some money but not so much that they are a ridiculous amount. I am not likely to get mugged for them. However, should anything happen to them I could possibly expire and definitely cry. Lots. It is stupidly sentimental but I love the fact that they are called 'Hope', the positiveness of this. The sense of a good outcome. I thought I lost one of them earlier and the bewilderment and sense of loss I felt was unbearable. It felt like I had literally lost hope. I did find it in the end so panic over but in the meantime it got me thinking about our own attachment to stuff. 

To things, objects, paraphernalia, items, junk, clutter or whatever else you want to call it that we hold on to for various reasons. It can get overwhelming, even 'become' an illness and this organisation is set up to help those with this type of condition.

I have watched the TV programs about the 'crazy' man or 'mad' woman living in a house so packed full of stuff that you have to crawl on your hands and knees to get through the door and not really understand why. How am I different with my own things?

This has got the makings of a good PhD for someone somewhere and certainly something that I find interesting. I believe though that it begins with empathy and compassion. You just don't know what that 'stuff' could mean to someone and why.

“You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view... Until you climb inside of his skin and walk around in it.”

Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird

photos from 'Links' website

Up

New year, new start.

There I was blogging merrily away in Egypt and trust the Nile, its immense beauty and the dahabiya we were sailing on to decide to have no web access and my blogging routine disrupted... In fairness, it was also my lack of blogging commitment that put a stop to the writing.  And life in general as the rest of our Egypt holiday was incredible and I've done loads of cool stuff as yet un-blogged since.  In addition, I'm still tweeting away in all its 140-character glory.

I don't do new year resolutions but more as a commitment to myself and by way of keeping in touch (sorry folks - you know who you are) I'm hoping to blog at least once a week as of today. Trust.

So, rather appropriately the first post of 2013 is about 'Up' - the Pixar film that everyone was raving about a couple of years or so back but I just didn't get around to seeing until today, New Year's Day 2013. What a day to watch it and what a wonderful film this is. I really can't believe it has taken me so long to see it.  In watching it through a veil of tears, snot and introspection it's reaffirmed to me that life really is about right now even though you may still be grieving for the life and future you thought you were going to have.   That it's also important to follow what makes you happy and that no matter what you have materially, those that care for you will always be the most important. (Oh my days, I think I'm off again *sobs*).

It is also really quite funny regardless of the weepy stuff I've written above. Really! It's got talking dogs in it, a boy scout and a grumpy old man - what more can a film need?!

2013 - let's make this a memorable one! 

Happy New Year!