Day Zero - Part 2

I tried to be strong and maybe it was all the drugs I had been given but I just cried throughout. So much hope and faith held in millions of tiny cells. I just want my life back. Is that too much to ask for?

12th August 2015 - my second factory reset, reboot, restart. Let the fun and games begin.

The night before Day Zero Stem Cell Transplant Part 2

'Twas the night before Day Zero...

Firstly, excuse the way I look. Chemo does that. Anyway, I got a complimentary foot massage earlier and one of the oils the lady used was frankincense. She asked what other oil I wanted to pair it with and obviously I had to say was gold or myrrh available?! Oh how we laughed. She's probably heard this dozens of times and was just being polite but still. I went for lemon oil just in case you were interested. 

This then got me thinking about the Special One and all the gifts he got from the Three Wise Men or Kings depending on which nativity play you have watched. I'm obviously talking about Jesus and not me or José.

Said in THAT tone of voice, I know some would say I was 'special'. Yes how very dare they  (har de har de har) but today I did feel special. So many of you were kind enough to send messages, texts and emails of love and support. Thank you so much. I'm so grateful. 

As you can see from my photo above, I also got gifts. It's not just Jesus! So;

Gift 1 - is from Mat from when I was first diagnosed and is a cuddly stem cell. Obviously. I love this guy so much. ;-) Go and work your magic folks!

Gift 2 - is from a nurse who remembered me from my last treatment and who said that she doesn't normally do this for her patients but because she thought  I was 'special' it was something to wish me luck for tomorrow. She was going to get me a dog but as soon as she saw this pink alien thing she thought it reminded her of me. Apparently, because it's different, bright and fun. Oh my goodness how blimmin nice is that?! Needless to say I got very choked.

Gift 3 - is from my Mum and is Oleg from the Compare the Meerkat adverts. I obviously get my randomness from her. No, me neither but it did make me laugh!

As I have said before and will never stop saying, thank you all once again for your love, support, understanding and kindness. You know who you are. 

Not just during this period but throughout the last few s#"%&y months during everything. A final and huge thank you to Fiona for the last two days. Have fun on your well deserved holiday! A star like you needs to dim occasionally so you can continue shining bright. Enjoy.

Once again, thank you all.

Going nuclear with Callippo

I've gone nuclear...with Callippo. To stop something called mucositis a new medical regime being encouraged is to suck on a Callippo ice lolly while the chemo is being administered. Apparently the cold in the mouth slows down the blood and so prevents the taste buds and other cells in there going scooby doo. That's as medical as you are going to get! I've had two so far and another one on the way.

Apart from a bit of a headache I feel OK at the moment. Hopefully I will be well enough to receive my new stem cells tomorrow so they can start working their magic. That's when the fun and games begin. Goodbye hair?!

In the meantime, enjoy the view from my window below.

My factory reset - 2nd stem cell transplant

So I'm now in hospital for my factory reset. Time for the nuclear chemo (Melphalan) to work it's magic. And destruction. That's the trouble with anything nuclear, everything gets destroyed in its path. Goodbye hair once again. But just as demonstrated by Hiroshima and Nagasaki commemorating 70 years last week since their atomic bomb destruction,  things do improve and rebuild. Better even. This is where my stem cells work THEIR magic. Come on you beauties! I keep telling and reminding myself this. I have to. Otherwise negativity will eat me up and like lots of things, people and events in life, cancer is not worth it. A big f#$k you cancer.

In between canoeing the canals of the Thames; kayaking in a Lidl kayak in the Cotswolds and not sinking (!!!); succesfully completing punishing six months of chemo; eating, drinking and laughing with friends and family, visiting amazing gardens, having fun in our amazing garden, seeing a wonderful ballet, discovering Deptford and most of all being given an opportunity to reflect and consolidate, the last few weeks have been good. I intend to be around for more of the same and then some. Just watch me.