I'm back, I'm still here, I never went away

Yes, I know I look like a duck & my hair needs a brush but it's a look okay?!

First and foremost my sincere apologies for the delay in posting this brand new blog post and for generally not being around in all aspects - blogging, emails, etc.  I'm pretty sure you are bored of looking at my flower pictures posted from last month and are due for an update.

Well, the flowers are now a lovely distant memory and the Valentine's cards have been sent and received.....and I have been rather unwell.  Yes, I know this is a bit odd to say given I'm going through cancer treatment but I was rather unwell in addition to the cancer treatment. Fun times!

In a nutshell, during the latter part of February I felt really terrible and I initially put this down to the chemo side effects.  When I actually felt like I was going to die (a little dramatic but I genuinely felt like I was going to!) we called the hospital and they asked me to come in immediately for tests.  

After an eye wateringly expensive taxi ride into central London via the strangest route in, I filled several test tubes with blood for various tests to find out what was wrong with me. The medical team did consider keeping me in hospital but fortunately I was able to go home once they had done their jiggery-pokery. 

The nasty that was making me so ill turned out to be the Influenza B virus which according to Wikipedia, so it must be true.... only humans and SEALS can catch!!!! I know my memory has gone all Scooby-Doo at the moment but I don't recall snogging a seal, so I can only put this down to catching it from the dirty cow who sneezed without covering her mouth at Waterloo Station and I was within droplet distance of her. To be fair, I could have caught it from anywhere but YUK!!!!! The hospital even made me wear that mask above for my repeat visit so I didn't infect other patients.  I was rather glad it was 'just' a flu virus and not another nasty such as meningitis, pneumonia and god knows what else they were testing for. 

To help fix me, on top of all my numerous cancer drugs was added four antivirals, an antibiotic, two bags of saline drips, fever, aches, pains and lots of tears of self-pity and frustration but I think I was allowed this. I had lots of good things planned with friends during this time and I was too unwell to do any of them.

I was pretty low. More so than my usual lows. Cancer really f-cking sucks anyway and to be ill with something else is just a bit too much for anyone in my opinion.

Thank you all for your messages, kindness, your friendship and your support. I'm so sorry I haven't had a chance to email some of you but it was just impossible at times. I will do so.  A big thank you to Dave and Milla for my lovely Meg Rivers Clementine & Almond Cake - courier delivered in a beautiful tin too! Wonderful sustenance!

Finally, I try and tell him everyday but I just want to say to Mat, my amazing husband, thank you. I know it must be frustrating being with me at times as I can be pretty off the scale in every way (believe it or not!!) but I appreciate everything you do for me.  I'm looking forward to the day I actually don't have any fatigue and we can climb together again one day but just know that being with you doing absolutely nothing means absolutely everything to me.